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I appologize for the sheer stupidness of this poem

Who Are You, Mary Sue?

By Waffles


Rated: G

I apologize for the sheer stupidness of this poem.

I'm was taking a break from writing and the Mary Sue

thing started to bug me soo....




Mary Sue, Mary Sue

Who are you?


She flipped her gold locks

And got up on her soap box,

She shouted down to me,

"Just listen, you'll see.


I am the most pretty

I am the most witty


I am the brainiest

I am the zaniest


Everyone loves me

How could they not?

For I am the best

That they've ever got."


Mary Sue, Mary Sue

Who are you?


Now I know

What makes you tick,

What makes you go,

You make me sick.


"But how can you hate me?

I'm the best there is!

No one can deny it

I've got all the jiz


I solve all the cases

I know all the guys

I am the most intelligent

And have the most beautiful eyes."


It was at this point

I took that box

I kicked it out from under her,

Quick as a fox.


"I know who you are now

And it's quite a shame

For as good as you think you are

You're really quite lame."


She sat on the ground

All covered in dirt

And cried up to me

"You messed up my skirt!"


I rolled my eyes

And let out a snicker

"I don't have time

To stand here and bicker."


So I left her there

Sitting right in the street.

"But I am so hot

And I am so sweet."


"Keep telling yourself that

But we all really know

You're not really it

It's just a big show."


As I turned to leave

I heard her start crying

I turned back to face her,

"No, really, stop trying."


She sobbed and she sobbed

And he let herself go.

I never saw her again,

But now I know.


Mary Sue, Mary Sue

I know who you are

I grinned as I waved

From the inside of my car.




Again, sorry for the lameness factor of this but I had

to get it out of my head before I was subjected to

writing my own Mary Sue fic...







Who Are You, Mary Sue? - Poem by Waffles



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