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Lost Love

Lost Love
by Waffles

Rating: NC-17
Warning: suggested m/m relationship/ no sex
Disclaimer: These characters are not mine, S. Cannell
owns them. The lyrics All of my Life are owned by the
Archive: Yes
Copyright: Liz Hill 8/00



"You're WHAT???"

Face stared at Murdock, shocked at what he had just
heard. He kicked the sofa hard, leaving a scuff on the

"I, I said I'm leaving. Me n' Susie-Ann are moving in

"Susie-Ann?? You barely know her! You can't do that,

"Why not, Facey? Stockwell doesn't need us anymore,
and well, with the team splitting up...."

"Yyou just can't, Murdock."

Murdock looked at Face. This was bothering the younger
man more than it should. Murdock put his hand on
Face's shoulder and guided him to the couch.

"Face, what is it? I'm a grown man, I've been on my
own since we came to Langley, and I think I'm falling
for Susie-Ann." Murdock squeezed Face's shoulder and
grinned. "You should be happy for me, Faceguy. I've
found someone. You don't have to set me up with your
ex-girlfriends anymore."

Face stared into his best friend's dark brown eyes. He
should be happy for Murdock. He'd really come a long
way from his days at the VA. He'd had several jobs, a
bit of a social life outside of the team, and for once
looked happy. Not the mask he wore for years, trying
to disguise his inner demons, but really, truly happy.
Face didn't want to ruin that for the Captain, but he
just couldn't let Murdock leave him.

Face continued to stare into Murdock's dark eyes. He
had to tell him. He just had to. Face mustered up
every inch of his courage, took a deep breath and
grabbed Murdock by the shoulders.

"You can't leave."

Murdock looked at Face. He could see confusion in his
eyes, but could not read the rest of his expression.

"Um, why not, Facey? Like I said, with the team
splitting up and all, you don't need me around

Face's eyes dropped. He mumbled just loud enough for
Murdock to hear.

"But I need you, Murdock."

Murdock's eyes opened wide. Did he hear Face right?
Murdock took his hand and slowly pushed Face's chin up
so they were seeing eye to eye again.

"Excuse me, Face?"

Face bit his lip and exhaled slowly, trying to keep
his emotions in check.

"I said I need you, Murdock. I.. I.."

"You what, Face?"

"I.. I .. love you, Murdock."

Murdock pulled away from Face suddenly.

"You love me? Faceman, I know you do, like a brother,
right? A best friend?"

Murdock was confused. If Face loved him, then why was
he making such a big deal out of it? Murdock loved him
too. But he thought he loved Susie-Ann more. They got
along so well, spent time together when the team
wasn't off on a mission.

Susie-Ann was a short, perky brunette, full of life
and adventure. She laughed at Murdock's bad jokes,
played with his dog Billy, and listened, really
listened to him when he needed to talk. They had
started out slowly, lunch, walks in the park, an
occasional movie, but as time went by they grew very

"I love you too, lil' brother! You're welcome to come
see me n' Susie-Ann anytime you want! I'd love to see
you again."

Face couldn't believe Murdock had said that. Why on
earth would he have made such a big deal about it if
he had meant like a brother, a friend? And brining
Susie-Ann up like that was the last straw. He jumped
from the couch, livid now, tears streaming down his
face. As he grabbed his coat, he turned to face


Face screamed at Murdock, unable to keep calm any
longer. 'How could Murdock have been so blind?' He
thought. Face spun on his heel and stormed out of the
apartment he had been living in.

Murdock sat dumbfounded on the couch. Face hadn't even
given him a chance to say anything. Murdock was so
confused. He loved Susie-Ann, he thought, but hearing
Face say those words to him brought back so many
hidden emotions. Murdock drew his legs to his chest
and buried his face in his knees. He sat on the sofa
for hours, crying, confused, hoping, hoping that Face
would come back.

Hours passed, soon night fell. Murdock fell asleep on
the couch, still waiting for Face's return. He tossed
and turned all night, whimpering in his sleep. When he
awoke in the morning, he was startled to find a note
taped to the inside of the front door. He got up and
peeled the note free. On the front, in Face's neat
handwriting was Murdock's name.

Murdock ripped the envelope open and read the enclosed

   It's obvious you don't feel the same way about me
that I feel for you. Because of this, I don't think I
can be around you anymore. Go on with your life, have
fun with Susie-Ann. You can just forget everything we
ever had everything we ever did. Don't come looking
for me, because you won't be able to find me. I need
time alone, time to figure things out.'

The message stopped abruptly, the last few words
smeared as it they had gotten wet.

Murdock reread the letter. Tears streaming down his
face. This letter stirred the same hidden emotions he
had felt yesterday.

"I love you, Face"

Murdock whispered to himself. His feelings from long
ago, resurfacing. He had been too scared to admit them
yesterday, because he still loved Susie-Ann as well.
He never dreamed Face would leave like this. He had
hoped he could talk it over with him today. Murdock
realized now how much of an ass he must have looked
like. He realized now, now that Face was gone, he had
to go find him, and tell him his true feelings.

He gathered himself together and tucked the note into
his jacket pocket on the way out. His first stop was
to tell Susie-Ann that he couldn't move with her. That
he loved someone else. Face. Face was the one he truly


"One minute please!"

Murdock could barely hear Susie-Ann's airy voice
through the thick door of her apartment. He shifted
back and forth, wringing his hand, a nervous sweat
forming on his brow. He had to tell Susie-Ann he
wasn't going with her. He heard a clatter from inside
the apartment and the door swung open moments later.
Susie-Ann stood rubbing her toe, shaking her fist at a
pile of boxes stacked up by the door.

"Murdie! You're here! I didn't expect you till later
today!" She threw her arms around Murdock and began
kissing his face all over. "Did you park the moving
van out front?"

Murdock stared down at his blue sneakers.

"Murdock? Is everything OK?" Susie-Ann pulled away
from Murdock and puzzled over the strange look on the
mans face. "You did get the van, didn't you?"


"NO?!? What do you mean no? We're leaving this
afternoon! The company said they had one left! I'm
going to call them now and give them a piece of my

Susie-Ann turned and started to storm over to the
phone. Murdock grabbed her by the shoulder and spun
her around.

"Don't do that, Susie-Ann. It's not their fault. I
didn't go get the van."

"Murdock! Why didn't you get it? What's wrong with

Murdock continued to wring his hands. 'How am I going
to tell her? I love her. I don't want to hurt her.'

"Murdock? What's wrong?"

Susie-Ann watched Murdock as he fidgeted back and
forth, the nervous sweat becoming more obvious,
soaking through the brim of his baseball cap.

"Um, Susie-Ann? Um, ah, I, um, I, ah..."

"What is it, Murdock? Just tell me, whatever it is we
can work it out. Did I do something wrong?"

"Aw no, Susie-Ann. You didn't do anything wrong at

"Then what is it?" Her eyes opened wide suddenly.
"You're not coming with me, are you?" Her voice
dropped to a whisper as tears formed in her eyes. "You
don't love me, do you?"

Murdock pulled Susie-Ann close. He murmured into her

"I do love you. I love you lots. But I found out that
I love someone else too. Someone who I've known for
years. I can't move with you if I keep thinking about
this other person. It wouldn't be fair to you."

Susie-Ann started crying. She tried to pull away from
Murdock's grip.

"I can't believe you, Murdock. You said you loved me,
we'd be together. You told me you loved ONLY me!"

Susie-Ann pounded on Murdock's chest with her fists
half heartedly, trying to pull back. Her mascara was
running down her cheeks leaving little black trails
where her tears flowed.

"You can't do this, Murdock. You just can't. I left my
job, I sold my apartment, everything, I changed
everything because of you."

Her punches got weaker and weaker on Murdock's chest
as she sobbed and lost her will to fight. Murdock
pulled her in to his chest, and stroked her hair
softly. He rested his head on hers, tears rolling down
his cheeks.

"I still love you, Susie-Ann. That's why I came by to
tell you this. I know it hurts, it hurts me to see you
like this, to have to tell you this. But I couldn't
leave without telling you first."

"Why, Murdock? Why? At least tell me who she is?"

Murdock thought. How could he tell her he was leaving
to find a man. A man who loved him very much, and who
he loved in turn. He had to tell her. He'd gotten this
far to telling her he was leaving, he should at least
answer her question.

"It's not a she."

A very meek 'what' could be heard from Murdock's chest
where Susie-Ann's head was buried.

"His name is Templeton. He's my best friend. Or was,
until he left when he heard I was moving with you. I
have to find him. I have to tell him I love him too."

Susie-Ann pulled away from Murdock, and wiped her
puffy eyes. She slammed her foot on the ground.

"A MAN? GET OUT! I don't care if you still love me,
because I don't love you anymore. Get out, and I never
want to see you again. EVER!"

The last word was punctuated by a hard slap to
Murdock's cheek.

"But.. but.. Susi-"

Murdock's words were cut off as Susie-Ann turned and
stormed off to the bedroom. He could still hear her
yelling at him to get out, and stay out. He called her
name one more time and was cut off by the sound of the
bedroom door slamming.

Murdock wiped his face with the back of his hand, and
turned and left the apartment. He looked back. 'I hope
I made the right choice.' He thought as he closed the
door behind him. It ripped him up to hurt Susie-Ann
like this. He was such a caring and understanding guy,
and then to turn around and hurt someone like this was
ripping him up inside.

He made his way back to his tiny apartment to gather
up his few belongings and set off on his journey to
find Face.

As he closed the door to his apartment, he mumbled
under his breath. 'Goodbye Langley, goodbye Stockwell,
goodbye team.....'


Face wept silently as he taped the note to the front
door for Murdock to find in the morning. He slipped
quietly out into the night, whispering 'I love you,
Murdock'. He got into his 'vette and pulled away from
the curb, tears streaming down his face.

"How could I have been so stupid?"  He pounded the
steering wheel with his fists. "I never should have
told him. Never."

Face drove in silence for hours. Not knowing where he
was going, but headed back to California. He wanted to
talk to Father Maghill. He drove and drove thinking of
what he would tell the priest, but couldn't find the
right words to tell him without mentioning Murdock's
name. He soon decided against going to see the priest,
but continued on his journey to the West Coast any

He doubted Murdock would come find him anyway, he
seemed too happy with his new girlfriend to care about
his friend.

Around 3 in the morning, Face's eyes started to drift
shut. He was awakened suddenly as his tires hit the
rumble strip on the side of the highway, startling him
and causing the 'vette to swerve dangerously as he
tried to regain control. He drove to the next exit and
pulled into a rest area to get some sleep. Face tilted
the driver's seat back as far as it would go, and fell
into a restless slumber. Tossing all night, cramped
because of the small quarters in the 'vette, and
pestered by Murdock's words from earlier.

'You can come visit.... I'm leaving..... You don't need

The words repeated in his head, Murdock's face filled
his dreams. Murdock and Susie-Ann.. a white picket
fence... toys littering the yard... and Face. Poor Face...
standing off to the side, watching his best friend
enjoy the love he found.

Dawn broke and Face was relieved to awaken from his
broken dreams. He pulled the car back onto the road
and headed for the highway again. Field after field
passed, the scenery unexciting. He couldn't push the
thoughts of Murdock and Susie-Ann from his head, so he
decided to turn on the radio, to try to cheer up. He
turned to knob to the on position, and fiddled the
dial to find the local station.

More hours passed as the morning sun began to make its
way across the sky. Face's mood was lightening, as the
radio was playing a slew of upbeat songs. He sang
along with them, happy that it distracted him from his
earlier misery. After stopping for dinner briefly, he
continued his trek.

He flipped the radio back on and his eyes instantly
filled with tears as he heard the lyrics of the
current song.

<<There are times that I should go away
to think of you and I
For it isn't only now, I need your love
All of my life, all of my life>>

Murdock's face floated back into his head as the words
repeated themselves.

<<In the night time when I lie awake
and think of you in my heart
For it isn't only now, I need your love
All of my life, all of my life>>

He thought of all the fun times they had had. The
scams they did together. The times he told Murdock he
loved him, pretending he meant like a brother.

<<Oh wouldn't you believe me if I told you
that I love you, and I do
Ev'ryone believes me when I tell them
Why don't you, why don't you>>

How many times he had brushed up against Murdock,
feeling his pants tighten. Wishing, just hoping that
someday they could be together. And now, now.... That
was all just a washed up dream.

<<When I think of things that ought to be
and I feel your hand in mine
Yes it isn't only now, I need your love
All of my life, all of my life >>

Face gripped the steering wheel and tears flowed
freely down his face now.  The lyrics repeating in his
head. Bringing back the painful feeling of Murdock
with Susie-Ann.
<< All of my life, all of my life
All of my life
All of my life
All of my life>>

 The tears were blurring his vision so badly Face had
to pull to the side of the road again. He lay his head
down on the steering wheel and began to sob openly.


Back in Virginia, Murdock threw his small suitcase
onto the passenger seat of his pick-up he had won
years ago on his short stint on Wheel of Fortune.
Tears filled his eyes as he pulled out of his parking
place and set off on his search for Face.


Murdock opened the passenger door again and whistled.
A moment later he shut the door and got into the
drivers seat. He leaned over and rolled the passenger
window down about half way, and put the suitcase on
the floor. He turned to the open seat and began to

"Now be careful, Billy. Don't stick your head out too
far. OK?"

He patted the air in front of him, put the truck in
reverse and backed out into the street. As he drove
off, he made the motions of petting Billy over and

"Say bye-bye to Langley, Billy. We won't be coming
back here.... What's that?"

Murdock leaned his head down a little and began to nod
his head every few seconds. Finally he sat back up

"I don't know where Face is, Billy. That's why we're
leaving. We have to go find him. I know, I know. You
love Face too, don't you."

Murdock continued to pet Billy, over and over, talking
to the dog, finding comfort in his hallucination. The
two of them drove for hours, in the direction of the
West Coast. It would take days for them to travel
cross-country, but Murdock didn't know where else to

"Where do you think he went, Billy?"

He paused and waited for an answer.

"LA? I don' know about that. It seems awful obvious,
donĂt you think?"

Murdock thought for a while, and decided that he
should just go back to LA, and hope he would run into
Face. If that's where he was going. He just couldn't
think of anywhere else that the conman would go. LA
had been his home for years, and he had always talked
about going back once they were done with Stockwell.
Murdock and Billy traveled for hours in silence. Each
pondering what to do next.

Day turned to night, and Murdock pulled the truck into
a little motel by the side of the road. All night he
had dreams of Face and the look on his face as he left
the house. He awakened with a start as the alarm went
off, sounding the beginning of a new day.

Murdock took a quick shower and packed his suitcase
back up and got back on the highway.

"Billy, with the time weĂre making, we're sure to be
in LA early tomorrow morning."

Billy just panted and licked the Captains face over
and over, making the sad man smile just a little. They
took off again and began their journey to LA again.

Along the side of the highway, Face had finally
regained his composure and had started off back on the
road. He traveled for the rest of the day, and all
through the night. He finally made it to LA and
promptly scammed himself a place to stay in a posh
suite in one of the nicer apartment complexes.

Weeks went by, and soon turned to months. Finally a
year had passed. Face went on with his life, hooked up
with numerous women, trying to quell his sadness over
losing his best friend. He was still exceptionally mad
at Murdock for what he said, but he tried to get over
it. He figured that if Murdock was happy with
Susie-Ann that was what counted. He tried to tell
himself that it was better that way. But he couldn't
shake his love, no matter how hard he tried.

Face wondered from time to time what ever had happened
to his ex-best friend. 'Where is he now? Is he married
yet? Kids?' Each time he thought like that it brought
tears to his eyes. He wanted to be the one cuddled up
close to Murdock at the end of a long day. The one
with the white picket fence. No more scamming, no more
lies, just love. Love with the older pilot. Growing
old together and loving each other till death.

He took long drives sometimes, all around the city,
hitting all of their old hang out spots, hoping that
the Captain had somehow come after him, left his
woman, to come profess his love. It was an absurd
idea. 'Why would he leave a sure thing, for someone
like me?' His drives usually ended with him at a small
bar, drinking, and picking up women to try to push his
feelings from his head.

One day, while Face was out on one of his many drives,
again thinking about Murdock, he decided he was
hungry. He was hungover from the night before, and had
not yet eaten. He drove by Cptn BellyBuster. The local
burger joint. It reminded him of the pilot as he
pulled into the drive thru line. 'This was Murdock's
favorite fast food joint.' He felt tears well up in
his eyes as he read the menu, deciding what to get.

'Murdock's favorite place.....'


"Welcome to Captain BellyBuster. Home of the
BellyBuster burger. Can I take your order?"

The voice crackled loudly over the weathered speaker
at the drivethru. Face jumped, startled by the loud

"Hello? Can I take your order?"

The voice repeated itself, this time sounding a bit
impatient. The voice was a bit garbled and hard to
understand. Face thought he recognized it, but through
all the static, he dismissed his initial feeling. He
stroked his chin as he perused the large neon menu.

"Ah, yeah. Sorry. I'll have the BellyBuster burger
combo, no pickles, with a Coke."

The speaker crackled again and the voice repeated his

"Anything else, sir?"

Face declined and pulled his car around the building.
He rumpled his brow as he thought about that voice.
'So familiar.' He thought to himself. He pulled his
car up to the window.

The pick-up window swung open and a hand poked out
with a bag and a drink.

"Three-Fifty-Seven please."

The drive thru operator's jaw dropped open when he saw
the man in the Corvette.

"FACE! OH MAN! I knew your voice sounded familiar!
Can't hear a thing on these headphones though."

Murdock started to smile, but stopped as he caught the
ice-cold stare directed at him.

"Face? You're not still mad at me are you?"

Face just glared and tossed his money at Murdock,
grabbed his food and peeled out of the parking lot.

Murdock threw his headset down as tears welled in his
eyes. He grabbed his coat and cap and ran out of the
restaurant, in a futile attempt to catch the 'vette.

Face pushed the pedal to the floor, leaving a cloud of
smoke as he left the burger joint. He was so confused.
Seeing Murdock brought back so many hurtful memories
of their last night together. He drove down the busy
street about two miles or so, then he finally pulled
to the side of the road. He felt the tears fall down
his cheeks as he tried to maintain his composure. This
last year he had cried more that he had in his entire

"Why did I do that? Why did I drive away?"

Face pounded the steering wheel in frustration. This
wasn't how it was supposed to be. He had dreamed of
seeing Murdock again, running into the Captains arms.
Hugging him, stroking his hair, kissing him.

"What is he doing here? Holding a job? That means he
must live around here."

Face started to get excited. If Murdock held a job,
then he lived here. But wait, what if Susie-Ann was
with him? Face could not risk getting hurt again by
seeing the two together. He had hoped over the last
year that some of the hurt would go away, but it
seemed his longing for Murdock just grew stronger
every day. Seeing him at the drivethru brought back so
much. Confused him. He didn't know what to do so he
just drove off like an immature teenager, unable to
face his true feelings.

He leaned back in his seat and closed his eyes to calm
down. He breathed deep, wondering what to do next.
Should he go back to Cptn BellyBuster and see Murdock?
Or should he just forget about it. Murdock was
probably happy with Susie-Ann and just working there
because he loved the place so much. He began to wonder
how long Murdock had been in LA without the two
running into each other. He stayed in his car by the
side of the road for what seemed like hours, but in
reality was only about 10 minutes. He was so wrapped
up in his thoughts, he did not see the small red
pick-up pull up behind his 'vette.

Murdock tore out of the restaurant, struggling to get
into his jacket and jump into the pick-up at the same
time. He flew out of the parking lot like a bat out of
hell, trying to catch Face's 'vette. He had to tell
him about Susie-Ann. He had to tell Face he loved him.
As he drove down the busy street, his eyes flicked
back and forth, trying to find his best friend. 'Or
ex-best friend' Murdock thought. Tears were falling
freely from his eyes, making driving a bit hard.

He gripped the steering wheel and tried to figure out
what exactly he would say to Face when he saw him. He
had been taken aback by Face's reaction at the
drive-thru. It had been a full year, and Murdock had
not been able to find Face when he came to LA. He
searched and searched but to no avail. Soon, he had
decided he had to at least find a place to live, and
get a job. He hadn't exactly given up on finding Face,
but a whole year of searching around LA for his friend
had taken a lot out of him.

Billy kept him company when he needed it most, when
things looked really down. The two played and
reminisced about the fun times they had had with Face.
The way Face treated Billy like a real dog when no one
else would.

Murdock's breath caught in his throat as he spotted
the white 'vette by the side of the road. He could see
Face's head tilted back, apparently thinking.

"He must have some feelings for me left, or he
wouldn't have pulled off to the side."

Murdock pulled the pick up behind the vette, stepped
out, and shut the door quietly. He didn't want to
startle the younger Lieutenant. He walked up to the
vette, still trying to figure out what to do. The top
was off on the car and Murdock could see Face's
slightly tanned face, and golden blond hair. Face's
eyes were closed and he did not hear the footsteps

Murdock stepped alongside the 'vette. He took a good
look at the younger man. Tears welled in his eyes
again. All his feelings for Face surfaced at once. He
realized how much he really loved Face, and how glad
he was to find him. He took a chance and leaned into
the vette. It was now or never. He was going to do
this no matter what Face's reaction was going to be.
If Face was still mad at him, it would hurt, but at
least he would have seen him one more time.

Murdock hoped Face was not still mad, but could
understand if he was. He had not acted like a good
friend the last time he saw him. Face didn't know what
had happened with Susie-Ann.

Murdock leaned down and took a chance. He took one
more look at Face's gorgeous face, and pressed his
lips against the younger Lieutenants. He pushed hard,
pushing his tongue past the soft lips. He hoped Face
would return the kiss. He yearned to feel the warm
tongue enter his mouth. He knew this was a big chance.
This could backfire horribly depending on how Face
felt about Murdock these days. Murdock placed his
hands on Face's shoulders and continued to kiss his
lost love.


Face jumped slightly as he felt the hands grip his
shoulders tightly. His eyes flew open and he saw the
tender face of his ex-best friend leaning towards him.
Face was startled as Murdock's tongue pushed its way
past his lips and began to probe the warm insides of
his mouth.  His mind was reeling. 'What do I do? I
love him...'

Face pushed Murdock away suddenly, confused about the
pilot's actions.

"M-Murdock? What are you doing here? I thought you
were off living with Susie-Ann. Where is she?"

Murdock pushed his finger across Face's lips to quiet
him. He walked around to the passenger side of the
'vette and hopped in.

"Susie-Ann and I broke up. I've been looking for you
since I found the note you left me a year ago. I
searched all over LA and never found you. I figured if
I waited long enough around here, I'd eventually find

Face looked into Murdock's chocolate brown eyes and
felt his heartbeat quicken as he heard the news about

"You broke up? What happened?"

Murdock grabbed Face's hands and intertwined his long
fingers with the conmans smaller hands. He stared back
into Face's clear blue eyes and began to tell him of
his break-up with Susie-Ann.

"Well, right after you left, I realized what a dope I
had been. Face, I loved you... I still love you. I just
didn't know how to react because I loved Susie-Ann
too. I waited for you to come back, so I could tell
you, but you came back while I was sleeping. When I
found your note, the first thing I did was go tell
Susie-Ann I couldn't go with her."

"What did you give her as a reason why?"

"I told her it was because I realized that I loved
someone, very deeply. I did love her too, but your
friendship and love meant more to me. I couldn't bear
losing an old friend for something that may or may not
have worked out. She wanted to know who it was. I had
to tell her. I'd been honest with her up to that
point, so I told her it was you."

Face smiled. He felt bad that Murdock had to hurt
Susie-Ann in the process, but he was very happy that
Murdock could tell her whom it was he loved.

"How did she take that?"

"Not that well. She slapped me, and then ran off into
the bedroom screaming for me to leave. I tried to tell
her I still loved her too, but she wouldn't listen. I
left and went back home and took off after you."

Face just looked at Murdock, his chest swelling as he
realized how much the pilot really loved him. Somehow
all his anger at the older man had dissipated the
moment he had heard that he loved him back.

"Murdock, why don't we go back to my place and we can
talk about what happened. I was so mad at you for what
you said. I never wanted to see you again, but hearing
now that you loved me..."

"Love, Face. I 'love' you, not loved, I still do."

Face felt the tears coming as he heard Murdock speak
the words he had been longing to hear for a long time.
He leaned over and wrapped his arms around the thin
pilot and held him tightly, not wanting to let go,

Murdock hugged back. He had wanted to feel Face in his
arms since that last night so long ago. Tears fell
from his cheeks and began to soak the shoulder of
Face's designer shirt. He pulled back, trying to wipe
the tears from his face.

"Oh gosh, sorry Face, your shirt, I hope that's not
going to ruin it..."

Face smiled and pulled Murdock close again.

"Murdock, you could never ruin anything."

They held each other tightly for a long time, happy to
have found one another. Finally they broke the
embrace, wiping the tears from each other's faces.

"Murdock, why don't you follow me back to my place,
and we'll talk this out, and see what to do from
here." Face paused for a moment. "I missed you, H.M..
I'm so glad we found each other."

"Me to Tem, me too..."

Murdock got out of the 'vette and walked back to his
truck. He was beaming from ear to ear. He climbed into
the pick-up and turned to the empty seat next to him.

"We found him, Billy, we really found him...."


Face sped off in the direction of his suite, Murdock's
pick-up tailing closely behind. Minutes later they
arrived in front of the posh apartment building Face
called 'home'. They pulled into the parking garage and
took the elevator to Face's suite. Face unlocked the
door and they stepped inside.

"Wooooo.... Nice place, Tem."

Murdock stuffed his hands in his pocket and whistled.
'Palace is what I should have said.' He walked over to
the leather couch in the center of the living room,
and sat down. He shifted around in his seat,
nervously, not knowing what to expect from his talk
with Face.

Face came over to the couch and sat down next to
Murdock. The both looked at each other, shifting
uncomfortably. Neither of them knowing what to say or
where to begin. Murdock fiddled with loose stitch on
one of the pillows.


Murdock stopped playing with the loose thread and
looked at Face. He shoved the pillow behind his back
so he wouldn't be tempted to play with it anymore.

"Yeah, Murdock?"

"Um, so what do we do now? I mean, its been a year, a
long year. I've been searching all over for you, now
that we've found each other, what happens now? You
still mad at me?"

Murdock lowered his head and stared at his hands as he
wrung his fingers together.  Face looked at the pilot.
How could he still be mad at Murdock? He left
everything he had, his girlfriend, his own apartment,
to find his friend. Left everything behind.

"I'm not mad anymore, H.M.. You left it all behind.
Just to find me. You could have gone on with your life
but you didn't. That means a lot to me, I didn't know
you cared so much."

Murdock turned his whole body towards Face, and placed
his hand on Face's knees.

"The minute you left, I knew how much I loved you. I
couldn't lose my best friend, I just couldn't. I
didn't go after you right then because I knew that you
needed time, I just thought you'd come back. When I
woke up and you really were gone, I had to find you... I
just had to..."

Face placed his hands over Murdock's and squeezed them
tightly. He stared into Murdock's eyes, seeing the
love and yet some sadness in them.

"What is it, H.M.?"

"I.. I just don't want you to be mad at me. I just
want to know that you still love me after what I said
and all this time."

Face didn't answer in words. He reached over and took
off the pilots' baseball cap and ran his fingers
through the thin brown hair. He pulled the pilot
towards him and kissed him deeply. This time Face was
the one pushing his tongue into the warm mouth that
awaited him. Murdock returned the kiss. The two men
sat embracing on the couch locked in a passionate kiss
for what seemed like hours. Their tongues wrapped
around each other, tasting each other's unique flavor.

Face ran his fingers up and down Murdock's back,
making the pilot moan and shiver. He ran his fingers
down to the waistband of Murdock's pants and slowly
began to un-tuck his T-shirt. He slid his hands up the
back of the shirt feeling the warm smooth flesh that
he had longed to touch for years. Face slowly pulled
his lips from the pilots and looked him square in the

"I do love you, Murdock. I'll always love you.

Murdock smiled and pushed his lips against Face's
again. He pushed himself down on the younger man, and
soon they were lying on the couch, a frenzy of tangled
arms and legs, kissing, and touching each other in
loving ways for the first time. Face pulled Murdock's
T-shirt up and over the pilots' head, revealing his
pleasantly hairy chest. Murdock sighed, feeling the
excitement coursing through his veins. He had never
done anything like this with a man before, but he knew
it was right. So right.

Face ran his fingers all over Murdock's smooth back,
slowly massaging his back, feeling every inch of
exposed skin. He could feel his erection growing and
pushing against Murdock's growing organ as well. They
lay kissing and slowly grinding their pelvis's
together, moaning at the new and wonderful feelings.
Face felt his orgasm growing already. The joy of
finding Murdock, and finding that he did love him, was
making this all the more exciting.

"Murdock? You sure you want to do this?" Face said
suddenly, praying that the answer be yes.

"Face, I want to do this, anything, everything with
you. I love you, I want to be with you, now, forever."

Face smiled his dazzling trademark smile, and the two
began the heavy petting again. Murdock pushed himself
up a bit to give his hands some room between the two
bodies. He reached down and began to unbutton Face's
shirt. As he slowly worked his way down the shirt, he
was revealing more and more of Face's tanned and
well-cut chest. Murdock bit his lower lip as he saw
just how beautiful his new lover looked.

He had seen Face shirtless before, many times, and
many times admired the beauty of it, but never before
had he been able to run his fingers through the light
patch of hair, never been able to pinch at the rosy
buds that lay perked up for him. Murdock finished
unbuttoning Face's shirt and slowly pulled him up as
he pulled the shirt completely off. Face pulled
Murdock back down, their bare chests touching for the
first time. Shocks of electricity ran through each of
their bodies, every sense heightened because of the
newness and the love between them.

Murdock began to kiss Face's chin, and soon worked his
way down to his Adam's apple and began nibbling on the
sweet tasting flesh. He kissed all up and down Face's
collarbone, making the conman whimper quietly. Murdock
ran his tongue down to Face's hardened nipples and
slowly drew one into his mouth. Face moaned out
Murdock's name as he felt the pilots teeth gently
begin to nibble and pull at the sensitive nub.

Murdock kissed and suckled each rosy bud, moving back
and forth between the two quickly, keeping Face
moaning and whimpering. He continued his way down
Face's muscular body and flicked his tongue in and out
of Face's belly button. Murdock felt his erection
pushing against Face's leg, growing harder than it had
ever been before. He pushed his organ up against
Face's leg, slowly rubbing it up and down, moaning
himself as he kissed his way down to the waistband of
Face's tight fitting trousers. He ran his tongue under
the waistband and licked at the elastic of his boxers.

"H.M., I love you so much. IĂm so glad you came to
find me. I want to be with you forever too....."

Murdock smiled into the crotch of Face's pants. He had
never been happier in his whole life. He found Face...
Face still loved him... and he loved Face just as much.
He thought to himself, 'this is where I belong, with
Face, forever.'

And with that, the two remained on the couch for
hours, getting to know each other in a whole new way.
Exploring, tasting, moaning, panting..... loving......

The End



Lost Love by Waffles
Lost Love - The Sequel by Waffles



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