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This page last viewed: 2017-10-21 and has been viewed 2421 times
The One With All the Gazing
Warnings: Slash, m/m pairing, sexual explicitness
Summary: Face and Murdock realize their true feelings for each other. They're in LOVE, just the way I like them!!
Murdock looked over at his friend. They had been sitting in companionable
silence since Face had come to join him in the
afternoon sun. Face had been in charge of breaking Murdock out of the VA a few days early. They had some downtime
before Hannibal and BA returned from setting up the Mr. Lee scam for the current client. Faceís currently scammed
residence was a gorgeous house with a sprawling backyard. Murdock had gone out on the back porch to bask in the sun
and his freedom from the VA. Face had let him go out on his own; he had seemed uncomfortable when Murdock invited
him out to relax with him. Several minutes later, however, the young lieutenant had ambled his way out to the porch, and
settled down beside Murdock.
Murdock ran his eyes over the younger man, taking in his weary state.
Face's hair was disheveled, which was odd for
someone who was usually so careful about his appearance. It became obvious that it was due to the man repeatedly running
his fingers through his hair, and Murdock found himself once again restraining the desire to push Face's hair back into
place. Instead, he put his hand on Face's shoulder to get his attention. Face jumped at the touch.
"Hey, Faceman, what's wrong?" Murdock was worried.
Face glanced over at Murdock, held his gaze for a moment, then quickly
looked away and, placing his head in his hands, ran
his fingers through his thick, sandy hair once more. "Nothing, Murdock. Nothing. I'm fine, I'm just...tired."
"Tired from what? It's been a pretty quiet month for us; you should
have had time to recover from that last mission.
Or....been tiring yourself out with the girls again?"
Silently, Murdock gritted his teeth, mentally cursing himself for seeking
out that information he really didn't want to hear. If
Face had himself in this state over a girl, it must be pretty serious, and Murdock found that he couldn't stand the idea of
Face getting serious over a girl.
Face's shoulders slumped even further, and he sighed.
Murdock's gaze darkened, and he wanted to look away, but couldn't pull
his eyes from his friend's forlorn form. "C'mon,
Face, which one is it this time? Looks like some girl's got you hooked good and proper, all right." He tried hard to make his
tone teasing, light, but wasn't sure if he succeeded.
The young lieutenant's face was buried in his hands, and his voice came
out muffled and despairing. "Aw, Murdock, I just
don't know what I'm gonna do. I'm supposed to be concentrating on this mission, and my thoughts are everywhere at once."
He fell silent, and Murdock broke in with a quiet, "Faceguy. If you can't tell me, who can you tell? I'm crazy, who am I to
judge other people's mental problems?"
Murdock's heart beat faster, as he found himself turning once again
to humor, to insanity, a front for his real emotions,
emotions that he could in no way allow to be exposed. He had no intention of ever scaring Face away like that. The very
least he could do was to be the best friend possible.
Face straightened from his slouch and stretched all the way down his
body, with his eyes closed, muscles rippling down his
chest and arms. Murdock managed to tear his eyes away before Face turned to him. He found the younger man looking at
him with a kind of desperation.
"Murdock, you're right, you're the one I can tell anything, knowing
you wonít judge me." He paused, and Murdock kept
gazing into those blue eyes, unable to tear himself away. Realizing that he had held the gaze too long, he forced himself to
relax, dropping his hand to Face's knee, in a way he hoped would be construed as companionable. Face started at the touch,
but didn't pull away. As a matter of fact, it seemed to relax him, and Murdock let the hope sneak into his heart that this
wasn't about a woman.
"Murdock, have you ever...? Face paused, gathering his scattered thoughts.
"Your friendship means more to me than
anything. We've been closer than ever, in the past few months, and I just don't want to make things any more complicated
for you, or to hurt you, but..."
Murdock broke in. "But, what I bug you, is that all? Your crazy friend,
the one you always get stuck taking care of, right?
Don't worry so much, Face, I don't need looking after, it just seemed right, I guess, but I wouldn't want to hold you back or
anything...". Murdock was trying desperately to sound casual, crazy, normal...cringing at the bitter tone that somehow
crept into his voice. He got up abruptly, and turned away, in an attempt to hide the hurt in his eyes, even though he was
trying to tell himself that he understood, that he wasn't going to force himself on Face, in any way. He stuffed his hands
into his pockets and tried to wander casually down to the other end of the porch, rather than storming off.
Face had jumped up a moment after Murdock did, shock and surprise in
his eyes. "Murdock..." he said, then more firmly,
"Murdock." He swiftly followed the lanky pilot down the porch and grabbed his arm. Murdock swung around to face him,
unable to hide the hurt and flash of tears in his eyes.
"Murdock, that's not it at all. At all." Face said desperately.
"Face..." Murdock said, his voice breaking, then abruptly tried to turn away again.
Face pulled him back, and Murdock stumbled into him blindly. Face, before
he could stop himself, acted on his deepest
instinct, and found himself taking Murdock's face in his hands and pressing his lips against Murdock's. The kiss lasted
only a second before Face pulled away, his face flaming, not quite believing what he had just done, his blood rushing in his
ears. He was terrified that his action had just made things much, much worse.
Murdock stood staring at Face, feelings of shock and creeping hope chasing
each other around his brain. Could this even
be happening? "Face, I..."
"Murdock, I'm sorry." Face said despairingly. "I guess this is what I've been trying to tell you, I..."
"Face." And, finally, giving in to the desire he had hidden for so long,
Murdock placed his warm hands on the younger
man's hips and pulled Face towards him as he delivered a return kiss. Face's body lost its tension, and seemed to melt into
Murdock's, as the kiss grew deeper, their tongues probing together, tasting each other for the first time. Slowly, they
pressed harder against each other, and as they acknowledged feelings long hidden, their excitement grew, and Murdock
could suddenly feel Face's erection pressing against his rapidly growing own. As he shifted, rubbing against him, Murdock
couldn't stop himself from letting out a soft moan against Face's mouth.
At the sound, Face's hands fell to Murdock's hips and pulled him tightly
against him, pressing himself hard against the
After several moments of this, Murdock forced himself to pull back.
"Ah, Faceguy", he managed to say hoarsely. "We
should go inside."
The implications of what they were doing seemed to slowly dawn on Face,
but it didnít disturb him as much as he thought
it would. His worries about what this might do to his life, Murdockís life, their friendship, faded away. This just felt so
right. He smiled. "You're right. Let's go upstairs." Face cleared his throat and stepped back, glancing ruefully down at the
bulge in his pants. "Um, so much for the womanizer of the team." He looked up at Murdock with a gleam in his eye,
comfortable with himself for the first time in a long time.
"Thank God!" Murdock responded with a grin, then gave Face a little
push to get him started into the house. After going to
one of the upstairs bedrooms and carefully closing and locking the door, they turned and looked at each other. Murdock
tried to put the passion he was feeling momentarily on the backburner. He knew that they had to discuss a few things
before he could let this go further. "Face, how did this happen? How did you...?"
Face tried a suave smile. "Those eyes, that grin. What can I say? I
was hooked, baby." Murdock just looked at him, and
Face dropped the con routine. He sighed. "Murdock, we've been as close as two friends can be for so long. For a while
now, the thought of taking it to another level has been there, but I just couldn't face it, couldn't face you--until I was sure
enough of myself. I knew it was a risk to our friendship. I didn't want to mess that up. I never guessed that you felt the
same way; would have made things a whole lot easier if I had."
He had been gazing at Murdock as he made this speech, and now Murdock
made a small movement with his hand, as
though to reach out to Face; then he restrained himself. Face smiled, walked over to Murdock, and kissed him lightly on the
lips. "There shouldn't be anything to worry about, not anymore, not now. The only way we can hurt each other is by lying
to ourselves. I, of all people, should know that."
They were nose to nose, hands on each other's hips. Murdock kissed Face,
hesitantly at first, then deeper, more feverishly,
his tongue probing deep into Face's mouth. Face responded eagerly, and the two men pressed their hips together, the
hardness of their erections grinding together.
Finally Face broke off the kiss, gasping, "Bed. We should go to bed."
"Right." Murdock said breathlessly, pulling back to gaze into Face's clear blue eyes. "Right."
Holding Murdock's gaze, Face made a backward movement towards the bed,
but stopped when Murdock didn't move with
him. The lean pilot seemed frozen in place, still looking into Face's eyes.
"Murdock", Face said, placing his hand on Murdock's cheek. Murdock rested
his face in Face's hand and closed his eyes.
"Murdock..." Face repeated hesitantly. "If doing this is going to make things more difficult for you, we don't have to...."
At the worried tone in Face's voice, Murdock's eyes snapped open. He
took Face's hand from his cheek and kissed his
palm. "Face, I've been thinking about this for a long, long time...probably accounts for my usual abstracted state...". His
deep brown eyes crinkled with his gorgeous grin. Face felt himself melting into that grin, experiencing feelings that
overcame all possible hesitations in his soul. Yeah, feeling this way about a guy scared him...scared him a lot. But it was
true: when he fell into that grin, those eyes, all that worry fell away. This was Murdock, who he could trust with his life,
had trusted with his life on any number of occasions. To have this chance was worth everything.
Face realized he had been looking at Murdock in silence for too long,
and felt himself blushing, as Murdock's grin grew
wider. "Face..." Murdock breathed. He leaned in, hesitated for just a moment with his lips a breath from Face's own. He
looked deep into Face's eyes, and Face held his gaze. "Face." Murdock stopped him, his brown eyes lightening, losing their
hesitation. "This has always been all I've ever wanted. It's always been you." Murdock closed his eyes and pressed his
lips to Face's, softly at first, then more firmly, feeling the heat rising between them as he broke the kiss, both of them
gasping for breath. He looked down at the young lieutenant, a self-deprecating smile on his face. He murmured, "Too, too
easy to get lost in those baby-blues."
This time, there was no holding back on either side as the two of them
came together, feverishly kissing, their two bodies
pressed close. This time it was Murdock who urged them toward the bed, without stopping the kiss, the two of them moving
blindly backwards. They reached the bed and paused, Murdock's fingers working swiftly down the buttons of Face's white
shirt, pushing it off of him, leaving Face clad only in his jeans. Face ran his own hands down Murdock's muscular
shoulders, feeling the warm skin through the T-shirt, then kissed his way down Murdock's neck, burying kisses in the
tanned skin, eliciting a quiet groan from the other man. Murdock's hands tightened on Face's waist, and he felt himself get
hard, hard like steel, wanting at the same time to both satiate himself immediately, and take all the sweet time in the world
pleasuring them both.
Murdock took a deep breath as Face pulled his T-shirt off over his head.
It left his hair mussed forward, and Face gave him
a slow smile. "That makes you look so sexy." Murdock ran a hand ruefully through his receding hairline, then reached up
to run his hand through Face's sandy locks as he had yearned to do so many times. His eyes crinkled in another grin.
He pushed Face back onto the bed and Face pulled Murdock down with him.
Lying beside Face, Murdock kissed him and
ran his hand down Faceís bare chest without hesitation. He stopped when he got to the waistband of his jeans, and Face
groaned against Murdock's mouth, took his hand, and pressed it urgently to his throbbing crotch.
Murdock gasped as he felt Face's hard cock, which was tightly straining
the denim, and he stroked it through the jeans,
causing Face to groan once more and arch up against Murdock's hand.
Murdock himself was as hard as he had ever been. His cock throbbed as he pressed it against Face's thigh.
Face caught Murdock's gaze and gasped, "Murdock, we've got to get rid
of these pants." Murdock grinned down at him and
teased "Getting all antsy there, Facey?" Face urgently lifted his hips up off the bed and pressed himself against Murdock.
Murdock gasped as their hard members made contact, his eyes wide. "Okay, okay," he managed to say. He swiftly stood up
and stripped off his own pants as Face lay back on the bed, his bronze chest heaving, and locked his hands behind his head
as he deliberately allowed his gaze to travel down Murdock's muscled body. Murdock met his passion-filled look, then
hooked his thumbs over the waistband of his boxers and pulled them off over his enormous erection.
He quickly knelt over Face's prone body on the bed and Face lay gazing
up at him. He met Face's eyes, then let his hands
travel down to unbutton and slowly unzip Face's jeans. Face maintained eye contact, but again arched his hips and gasped
as Murdock's hand made contact with his hard cock. Murdock swiftly pulled off Face's jeans and shorts, leaving him lying
naked on the bed. He paused for a moment, kneeling over him, running his eyes down the near-perfect figure. Murdock met
Face's eyes, and flashed him a smile. "You're like my own little Greek god, right here." His eyes traveled down to the hard
cock, and he reached to run his fingers along its length, causing Face's erection to throb, and Face to gasp once again.
Murdock's grin broadened and he amended, "Well, not little."
Face laughed up at Murdock, grabbing him around the waist and pulling
him down on top of him. "C'mere, you" he
murmured against his mouth, then, kissing him deeply, used his hips to lever Murdock up off of the bed, and reversed their
positions, so that Face was on top. All of his inhibitions were gone, vanished, and Face adored the feeling. He was pressed
against Murdock, gazing down into his huge, dilated eyes. He saw passion, love....and utter trust. He pressed himself
against the tall pilot, felt Murdock's erection throbbing against him. Murdock's breath was coming fast, and his cheeks were
flushed. He pressed himself urgently against Face, feeling their erections rub together. Face, still gazing into Murdock's
eyes, thrust himself against Murdock and groaned, "Murdock... Murdock, I've never wanted anyone, any of those
women, the way I want you--the way I've wanted you, for so long."
Murdock gasped, at a loss for words, bucking up against Face's body.
Face lowered his mouth to the pilotís, kissing him
passionately, trying to convey in that kiss all of the feelings he had hidden, from both Murdock and himself, for so very
long. By the time he pulled away, they were both trembling. Murdock placed his strong hands on the younger man's hips
and thrust himself up against him. "God, Face, god," he groaned. "You're making me crazy."
Face, his cheeks flushed, grinned down at him. "Really? And here I thought you'd been crazy all along."
Murdock grinned up at Face, then used his hands on Face's hips to maneuver
himself against him, hard, his cock pressed
against Face's, the friction almost to wonderful to bear. He could feel them sliding together, their pre-come providing
Face's breath was coming in gasps as he moved his hips against Murdock's,
the strong hands pulling at him, driving him
towards climax. "Murdock..." He gasped, grabbing at the bedsheets, struggling to get closer to the pilot. "Oh, god,
Murdock, please, please!"
Murdock felt himself get even harder, felt the hot come boiling up inside
him. Abruptly, he flipped Face over, eliciting a
long drawn out groan as he rolled over on top of him, thrusting hard, his hands still on Face's hips, Face's hands clutching
at his ass.
Face moaned loudly, bucking up against him. "Murdock...please! Oh, god...".
Murdock was moaning loudly, his left
hand wrapped in Face's hair, his right clutching Face's hip. He slid and thrust hard against him, still unable to believe that it
was Face he was doing this with, Face. "Oh, god, Face," he moaned. "Please..." And as he desperately thrust against
him, he felt Face buck wildly, let out a moan that shook the bed, "Oh, god, Murdock, now!" and arched his back as he
exploded against him. That warm wetness was all Murdock needed to push him over the edge into climax, and he felt
himself pump out against Face as Face's body was still subsiding from his orgasm.
They lay together quietly, exhausted, recovering. Murdock attempted
to pull away, murmuring, "Donít wanna crush you",
but Face languidly pulled him back, saying, "Not so fast babe", and pulling him into a kiss. "Although", he amended,
looking ruefully down between them, "we should probably get cleaned up." He looked up into Murdock's eyes, which
sparkled as he responded, "Hope your shower is big enough for two."
After the long, hot shower, Face and Murdock, exhausted, climbed back
into bed. Murdock got in hesitantly beside Face,
still unsure, despite their lovemaking, how to behave around the usually brash lieutenant. He looked up and saw Face,
reclining, give him the sweetest smile. Then he reached out and pulled Murdock into his arms. Murdock allowed himself to
relax against that golden body, allowed himself to be kissed lovingly. His face rested against Face's shoulder and he tilted
his head to look up at Face.
Face reached for Murdock's hand and entwined it with his own. He studied
their two hands together, linking and relinking
their fingers, never letting go. He felt Murdock's gaze on him and turned to look at him. Murdock's eyes were huge and to
Face's surprise, held tears. Face brought his hand to rest against Murdock's cheek, his own eyes filled with concern.
"Murdock...what's the matter?" Murdock shook his head hurriedly and a tear escaped down his cheek. "Not a thing, me
compadre, not a thing. Just checking....just hoping...I...".
"Murdock...". Face silenced his fears with a loving kiss. "Murdock...all
I want is to be honest with you...with myself. I've
never wanted something so very much. This is real to me, more real than anything I've ever known. You and I...we have
something--here." He touched Murdock's chest. "I connect with you in a way I've never, ever thought possible. I hope that
you're willing to take a chance on me."
Murdock found himself grinning through the tears falling down his cheeks.
"Faceguy..." he breathed. "You're more than a
chance. You're a love song brought to life." He kissed him, softly, then more passionately. He felt himself rapidly growing
hard once more, and grinned up at Face. "What do you think, Face? Willing to take another chance with me?" Eyes
twinkling, Face pulled the lanky pilot into a deep kiss, then murmured against his lips, "Anytime, Captain. Anytime."
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