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I Didn't Know Football Could Be THIS Good!

Author:  H.M. Murdock

 

Rating:  G

Summary:  For a brief glimpse in history, Murdock had an account on a website and wrote periodic journal entries.  This is the seventh and final real entry before the sign-off bulletin in which B.A. is once again mocked by fate as Murdock must spend Super Bowl Sunday weekend at his apartment. 

Warnings:  Nuffin'.

Disclaimer:  I do not own these characters, nor am I making any profit writing about us them.

 

 

I Didn't Know Football Could Be THIS Good!

February 7

Mood: Amazed

Listening to: BA yelling at the television

Reading: P.G. Wodehouse's "Very Good, Jeeves"

Watching: BA watching the television

Playing: Football enthusiast

Eating: Chips, pork rinds, chilli, salsa...everything...

Drinking: Coke, 7up, root beer...Lots of soda!

 

:the Baracan one sits crouched on the couch in his apartment, bedecked in sporting attire, staring intently at the screen, yelling suggestions and support to his team:

:to the referee:
Hey man, that wasn't no foul!


:with platter of nachos, comes and sits down next to BA, gazing at the television with excitement in voice:
Oh, I just love watching the Stanley Cup! These guys are the peak of entertainment, BA. I mean, look at how--

:looks up in disbelief:
The Stanley Cup?! That's hockey, fool!

 

Well, that's the problem with football, BA. They work just as hard as the hockey guys, minus all the loose teeth, the dexterity necessary for ice skating, and the wooden poles, but they don't win the Stanley Cup! After all that, they deserve a giant trophy like the Stanley Cup!  Me and Porky here are writing the NFL oversight committee, requesting that they instate the Stanley Cup as a prize for winning the football championship.

:looks up in bewilderment:

Porky?

:sees plate of football snacks that has been impressively arranged into a Picasso-style face of pork rinds, chilli, and cheese sauce:
Now listen, Murdock, you keep Porky to yourself and be quiet, or your shirt will get to know Porky a lot better! Hannibal and Face are gonna pay for leaving you here with me on Super Bowl Sunday.


Super Bowl Sunday!
:leaves Porky to save seat on couch and begins rummaging around in the kitchen:

:goes back to watching the game and begins getting very aggressive due to a few bad plays, but apparently enjoys getting riled up over a bunch of fat guys running full-force into each other:

 

:comes back, equally content, but not nearly as riled, with salad bowl full of ice cream, fudge topping, coconut, a maraschino cherry, and lots of rainbow sprinkles:
Ah...

 

:looks up in disgust:
What's that, sucker?

This, BA, is the best thing you've invented.

What? What're you rambling about this time, Murdock?

Just what you said! It's a super-bowl-sundae!
:closes eyes: Waahaahaa...

:stares briefly and turns back to the tube, glad that the ice cream ought to at least provide a few minutes of interruption-free football; but, ironically, the station flips to a commercial break:

:goes back to eating ice cream with chop sticks:

 


I Didn't Know Football Could Be THIS Good! by H.M. Murdock

 

 


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