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No Animals Were Harmed…

Author:  H.M. Murdock

 

Rating:  G

Summary:  For a brief glimpse in history, Murdock had an account on a website and wrote periodic journal entries.  This is the second, set up in the general format in which it originally appeared.

Warnings:  Implied and slight description of senseless violence toward technological hardware for the sake of art.

Disclaimer:  I do not own these characters, nor am I making any profit writing about us them.

 

 

No Animals Were Harmed...

October 12

Listening to: My studio audience

Reading: King Henry IV Part 1

Playing: Sympathetic

 

:wearing artist's smock and cap, painting picture while explaining technique to camera:
When painting a landscape, you want to be sure that your proportions are all correct--the trees—

 

:tv static:

 

We take this break in "Art With Murdock" to bring you a special message:

 

:stands, serious look on face, sans artistic attire, in front of camera:
I want to bring something to your attention.

 

Some people make a big deal about cruelty to animals--in films, in lab experiments, in shampoos--in all sorts of different media. So much so that these animals even have entire organizations of individuals who violently and passionately ensure that they are protected at every waking moment. They spend money they could be using to buy moccasins and cheeseburgers to ensure that my hamburger is comfy before I eat it, etc., etc., etc.

 

What is the point of all this? The point is that there are lots of people out there worrying about my cheeseburger's comfort while millions of cassette tapes are being slaughtered for the sake of "art" every day! Don't believe me? Look at this:
:holds up photograph of a mutilated tape:

 

That poor cassette tape had its guts wrenched out for a picture! A picture!

 

What's worse is that there are thousands of similar cases that go unnoticed every day and nobody does anything about it.

 

:picks up pictures and begins flipping through them:
If you don't believe me, here are some similar examples that I would not recommend for the easily-disturbed:

 

:points out a particular picture:
This is especially terrible because it is an Acappella album.

 

:flips through a few more, and highlights another:
This one is not a photo; nevertheless, it promotes this senseless murdering through a sketch.

 

Now that you have seen these ghastly examples, will you stand for this? Will you keep allowing these poor cassettes that can't protect themselves to be mutilated for the sake of "art"? I, for one, will not!  I, along with the Audio Cassette Right Protection Association demand a call to arms to save these little guys from the real—too real—threats the artistic community is continually imposing upon them!

:tv static, back in front of camera with cap and smock again:

 

...and now, back to "Art With Murdock".

 

:offcamera:
How about "back to 'helping work on this van,'" fool?

 

Okay!
:slathers paint on brush and heads for van:

 

:camera fades:

 


No Animals Were Harmed... by H.M. Murdock

 

 


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