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This page last viewed: 2017-10-22 and has been viewed 1573 times
Summary: Face and Murdock meet secretly and both know they shouldn't be doing this. Slash.
Disclaimer: I don't own the A-Team, I don't make any money from this.
"We shouldn't be here."
Murdock walked back to the bed where he'd been lying when Face knocked.
"We're not supposed to be doing this."
Despite his words, Face locked and chained the motel room door behind him.
Murdock lay down again, propped up on an elbow. He left plenty of bed free, but Face didn't join him. Instead, he started to pace the small room. Murdock couldn't read his expression in the dim light, the afternoon sun cut off by the drawn shades. But he guessed Face wasn't smiling.
"Take your coat off," Murdock said. Face didn't. Just went on pacing.
"If we do this... If Hannibal finds out we did it again."
"Is Hannibal the boss of you?"
"Well yes, Murdock." Face stopped pacing and frowned at him.
"He's the boss of you too."
"Only when we're on a mission. Come and lie down." He ran his hand over the empty space beside him, which he wanted Face to fill.
Face shook his head. "This affects the missions, you know that."
"Tell that to the Spartans. Come on, Face, come on. If you didn't want to be here you wouldn't be here."
Face snorted and did finally take off his leather jacket, running a hand over his forehead after he hung it on the back of a chair. Warm in here. Murdock had made sure to get a room with no air conditioning.
"You tried that 'Spartans' argument on Hannibal before. It didn't work. And we had to sit through a lecture about the battle of Thermopylae."
"I enjoyed that."
"All those big strong men in their armour getting all sweaty."
"Knock it off!"
"Hmm, getting you all sweaty, Faceman?"
Face glared at him. He did indeed look sweaty. Though that was probably the lack of air con. Dammit, just take your clothes off will you?
"Come on, Face. I'm only out for a few hours. Have to get back. Things to do. Doctors to baffle. Do we have to do this every time?"
Face moved slowly to the bed and looked down at Murdock. "It's just... You know I want to... but it's not easy for me."
"I know." Murdock sat up now. God, did he know. How many years had he listened to Face telling him that? It practically counted as foreplay by now. The priests and nuns had done their job well on him. Face and Murdock only did this every few months. In Murdock's opinion, this was because it took Face that long to get over the guilt.
Every few months. That's not too much to ask surely? Last time had been October 9th. Now it was July 27th. Long enough.
Abruptly Face sat down and started to take his shirt off. It happened that way every time too. Like he'd decided in a snap and then he had to get on and do it right away, before he lost his nerve.
"Let me," Murdock said, when Face moved from the shirt cuffs to the collar button. He knelt up behind Face and reached around to start to undo the shirt buttons. While he did that, he kissed Face's neck and ear and heard him sigh. Relief? Resignation? Surrender? Giving in to the urge he tried so hard to fight. The urge he always paid for later.
Face raised his arm, to put it around Murdock's neck, pulling him closer. Murdock finished with the buttons and ran his fingers down the strip of bare flesh exposed by the open shirt, feeling hard muscle and sparse hairs and wanting more. Much more. He moved back a little and slid the shirt down Face's arms. Now he had the delicious dilemma of deciding which bit of tanned skin to kiss first. Shoulders, back or arms? He'd work his way around them all eventually.
But as he started to, Face turned, into his arms, climbing onto the bed and they kissed. That was the signal, Murdock knew. The sign he'd surrendered to his own desire and Murdock's. His kisses and his hands became more eager. In a moment, Murdock raised his arms to let Face pull the T-shirt off over Murdock's head, catching his ears. Murdock heard the crackle of static electricity in the shirt - curse that damned VA laundry - and his hair ended up wild and floating, while his T-shirt sailed across the room.
Face kicked off his shoes and pulled Murdock down on the bed, still kissing him. His hands grabbed at Murdock's belt, fumbled with it in his haste.
"Slow down," Murdock said, pushing the hands away, taking care of the belt himself. "There's no rush."
"Come on, you said it yourself that you're only out for a few hours," Face said, his voice hoarse now, breath short. "We could go out afterwards. Do something fun."
Murdock stopped and raised his eyebrows at that.
"Well now I'm just offended."
"Never mind. Just shush. Lay back."
Every time, like the rest. Almost a routine. Face wanted to rush and Murdock had to slow him down. As he dropped kisses, all over Face's shoulders and chest, working down, he knew Face would push on his shoulders. Faster. Faster. It made him jealous as he'd bet Face never rushed with the women. But Murdock had worked it out eventually. It was more than simply urgent desire. Face wanted to get it over quick, because the faster it went the easier he could deny it had happened at all.
He couldn't deny it now though, not in this moment. Murdock wouldn't let him. Face couldn't deny the weight of Murdock's body on his, the heat and solidity of the flesh that pressed against his. He couldn't deny Murdock's hands and mouth, his touch, caressing and firm and almost too much, too good.
Oh, please. Never let him have the strength to stay away.
That was selfish though, Murdock knew. He knew how much the guilt ravaged Face afterwards, but Murdock wasn't strong enough to resist any more than Face was. He told himself over again, after each time, that he'd stop taking advantage of Face. Would just let him be. But the memories haunted Murdock. Memories of moaning, gasping and perfect pleasure with him.
And he had no more strength to resist it than Face had.
Face heard Murdock and came out of the bathroom. Murdock's worried look changed to a smile and he lay back on the bed, arms crossed behind his head. "I thought you left."
"Of course not." Face stood looking down at the bed. Should he get back in? Why? They were done, so now they could get dressed, go out.
"Come back to bed," Murdock said, turning the sheets down on the empty side.
"I thought we were going out. There's a great new restaurant I --"
"I'm not hungry."
Neither was Face, but sometimes it was easier to be where Murdock couldn't jump him. Or at least where Murdock had promised not to jump him again. Face didn't need to be banned from any more restaurants.
"There's a ton of stuff we can do if you prefer --"
"I just want to sleep. Come on." He patted the bed. Cold suddenly, standing there naked, Face did get back into bed, seeing Murdock wasn't going to get out of it.
Murdock snuggled down beside him. "That's better." He closed his eyes.
What was the use of sleeping here? Face wondered. That wasn't spending time together, was it? Perhaps Murdock thought so, but Murdock wasn't a man who thought the same way as other men.
And here Face was, sleeping with him. Taking advantage of a crazy person. There's probably a special corner of hell waiting for me. Two devils put aside for me.
Face tried so hard to resist. Ignored the hungry looks Murdock cast his way, as the time stretched since the last... indiscretion. He tried hard to repress the memories of all the other times he'd been unable to resist.
He thought again about the words Hannibal had used, when he found out. Hannibal probably had other words he wanted to say, but didn't. The ones he used were bad enough. Dangerous. Foolish. Reckless. Wrong.
Face had made him a promise after that. It took him seven months, one week and two days to break it. Murdock gave him the number. He kept count.
Wrong. Well Hannibal didn't have to tell him that. He'd known that all along. Long before it had been Murdock tempting him, Murdock convincing him that he could expand his horizons. He'd finally relented one insane night, before that trip to the bank had changed everything.
After that, he'd sworn he'd be strong, that it couldn't happen again. And Murdock was too sick anyway. But Murdock slowly got better.
Murdock was actually snoring now. Not loud, but clearly asleep. Face sighed and settled down. He couldn't sleep. Sleeping was wasting time. He could sleep any time. If Murdock wanted to spend time with him, why did he want to be asleep? It made no sense to Face.
Nevertheless, he slid one arm around Murdock and held him close. If this was what he wanted, indulge him. After all, it would be a while before they did this again. If they ever did. Perhaps this time he'd manage to stay strong.
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