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This page last viewed: 2017-06-23 and has been viewed 1380 times
Billy, Joshua, the Colonel and Face
AUTHOR: Viskey Utsadanas
DISCLAIMER:I don't own the A-Team and I don't make any profit with my writing.
WARNINGS: silliness, a little language
SUMMARY: Just the team on a day off
not been too late in the evening, when
"Not too bad an idea, the Big Guy had there..." Murdock got up, and followed BA.
"Twenty commies, I swear!" one of them said with emphasis.
"Oh, c'mon, Harp! Twenty! Nobody'll believe that shit."
"I saw it with my own eyes!" Harp insisted.
"Then why didn't you help, and let Smith do it all by himself?" a third joined in.
Harp was silent for a moment. "Ran outta ammo. He dunnit all by himself."
"Harp, take my advice: Just forget it. You've never even come near to any of the A-Team. So stop talking crap. Have another drink."
"Twenty, I swear, on my mother's grave," Harp stubbornly insisted.
"Your mother's alive."
"On my grandmother's."
"Oh, fuck you all!" Harp got up and walked to the back of the bar to the toilets.
was that about?"
"Uh! Harp again," the sergeant, who'd mainly talked to Harp, said as if it explained everything. "He's so smitten with the A-Team, he always comes up with new fantastic stories about them. And he's always been there, seen it with his own eyes, da-da-da." The sergeant suddenly realised he was talking to a colonel and straightened up a bit. "Forgive him, he's drunk, Sir."
there's no need to apologise,"
"Well said, Colonel," Face commended.
Sir," the sergeant filled the gap. "And it's just crap, Sir." he
shrugged. "Like they've blown up half of
Just at that point, Murdock returned.
have a seat and keep us company,"
"Whatever you want," Murdock answered carefully, sitting down.
"Well, there's not much left to tell. Harp's always coming up with shit like that. He said, the chopper dropped out of the air from 120 ft, and nobody was even hurt. I mean, who's gonna believe that anyway?"
"Colonel, what exactly are we talking about?" Murdock asked most politely.
I've heard, their pilot never crashes?" Murdock frowned deeply. Face and
Murdock was comforted with that, and put on a dreamy expression. "Yeah... Murdock," he sighed. "I really wish I could meet that guy some time. Just think of all the things he could teach me..."
"Ah, Joshua!" Face exclaimed, when he saw BA approaching. BA started only a bit at the use of this name. He knew, Face loved his life too dearly to use it without reason. So he just sat down, grabbed his bottle of beer and leaned back in his chair, waiting for the explanation.
you've missed quite some entertainment," Murdock said. "He,"
Murdock pointed at
That was all BA needed to be in the picture. "Heard the man's all crazy," he answered.
"Uhm, just to clear this up, I didn't say, I know him,"
"No? Too bad. I was gonna ask you to do the introductions." Murdock snapped his fingers in mock frustration.
"Ask Harp," a soldier at the far end of the table contributed.
"Does he know him?" Murdock asked eagerly.
least, that's what he always says."
"I'll go and get another round," Face announced, getting up. "I assume, I can count you guys in?" He turned to the group of soldiers, who all nodded their thanks. "I won't be long."
"So, what do you think of the A-Team?" Murdock asked. Shrugs and indifferent murmurs were his answers. "What, seems you don't very much like them?"
"Hey, if you got your ears chewed off with stories 'bout 'em, you'd start hating 'em as well," one said.
"See, 's what ah always tell ya, Billy," BA said in direction of Murdock. "You babble too much, you get hated."
"Yeah, yeah, Joshy, whatever you say," Murdock replied disdainfully.
"What'd I miss?" Face asked, returning with an armload of bottles.
"Billy, just how could you? Have you ever taken a look at Joshua here? He'd be able to smash you with just his thumb and forefinger." Face shook his head, even while handing out the bottles.
how often can you hear how many Charlies Colonel
Hannibal has taken out single-handed?"
At that, Harp returned.
Harp, we've been missing you,"
"What took you so long? Had a nice chat with the A-Team while peeing?" One of the soldiers teased.
"You wouldn't recognise 'em, when you bumped into 'em," Harp accused.
"Course, I would, we're buddies!" Harp exclaimed, wholeheartedly.
I see." A wide grin spread over
"Just yesterday," Harp claimed.
we were on patrol yesterday,"
"Ok, ok, so it was day before yesterday."
"Who do you like best of them?" Face asked, taking a swig from his beer. He wanted to keep the conversation focused.
"Ah, 's hard to say," Harp answered quite diplomatically. "I'd say, it's
"Yeah, yeah, don't get all excited, man," BA grumbled softly.
"Who do you like second best?" Murdock asked.
"BA," was Harp's surprising answer.
"Really, why?" Murdock asked, genuinely curious. Sure, he liked BA himself, but BA was not exactly the most endearing person around.
"Why not?" BA snapped, before Harp could answer.
"Yeah, why not, dammit!" Harp shot at Murdock. "He's strong."
needs somebody to keep him out of trouble,"
don't need anybody to fight for me!" Harp exploded, stopping short of
"I bet you do," BA commented dryly.
Harp didn't quite know how to answer that, therefore he didn't. He took a sip of his beer instead, and then another sip.
"What about Face?" Face asked. He was impatient to hear something about himself.
"Ah, he's..." Harp didn't go on.
BA, Hannibal and Murdock snickered, enjoying Face's evident frustration.
"He's..." Harp started again.
"I think Harp doesn't like Face," Murdock teased.
"What makes you think that?" Harp snapped at Murdock. "I like him, I like him. Everybody likes the Faceman!"
Now Face beamed. "You hear
that?" he repeated
"Yeah, yeah, just don't get all excited about it, will ya?" Murdock took over BA's part.
"What, don't you like him?" Face asked.
"Sure I like him," Murdock answered lightly.
"You... you know him?" Harp asked, suddenly very careful and nervous. And he looked a great deal more sober than just a minute ago.
"Yeah, sure I know him. I'm a pilot, see, I've flown them places every now and then..." Murdock flailed his hand absently like it was just nothing, which of course for him, it wasn't.
Everyone in Harp's group snapped to attention at that. This promised to become interesting. It didn't matter if Billy had really met the A-Team or not. Just seeing a few holes being drilled into Harp's stories was fun.
"They got Murdock to fly them around. They don't need you," Harp quickly asserted, feeling solid ground under his feet again.
"Maybe he was ill or just didn't want to fly them," Murdock insisted. "Anyway, I got to fly them on occasion."
Harp was silent, obviously unable to find anything to invalidate Murdock's statement.
What do you think of 'em?"
a nice bunch of people," Murdock said easily, running his hand over his
throat. "But largely misunderstood, I must say.
got some of his beer down the wrong way as he had to laugh. Even BA grinned.
Harp was about to protest, but Murdock beat him, as he went on, "Face..." Murdock cast an inspecting look at his fingernails, "he's... You know, there are all those stories about how dashingly pretty he is..." Face had just raised his bottle to drink, but now halted in his moves, awaiting Murdock's next line. "He isn't," Murdock deadpanned. Face almost dropped his bottle and stared at Murdock. "But he's got some charms, I gotta grant him that," Murdock quickly changed direction, he didn't want to piss Face off, after all. "If he wants something, he usually gets it." Face lifted his bottle again, somewhat reconciled. "I guess, he's so charming, people simply don't notice that he isn't all that pretty." Murdock flashed a challenging glance at Face, who pulled a slight face and silently promised to make Murdock pay for that statement.
"BA, now..." Murdock grinned broadly, "he's a real darling."
"Watch your mouth, sucka!" BA broke in. Nobody called BA Baracus a "real darling"!
"Fool's always embarrassing," BA shot back, "no matter what he does."
"Joshy..." Murdock chirped, "Big Guy... "
"Shut up, fool!"
Face turned his attention from his teammates over to the soldiers they'd been chatting with. He revelled in their looks of confusion. "Don't bother them," he said amiably, "they're not gonna hurt each other. It's just their way of showing their affection for..." Face wasn't able to finish.
"You shut up, too!" BA growled at him. "You're no better'n the fool there."
"But... but..." Face tried to reason, while unsuccessfully trying to remove BA's fist from his collar.
"He was talking nonsense!" BA complained, nonetheless he loosened his grip on Face's shirt.
"Aw, we're on leave," Murdock whined, though not sincerely.
I'd like it to stay that way. If we carry on, some of us might end up in a
hospital, or a brig."
BA just grunted.
"Ok, guys. Let's hit the road,"
"Always the one's who's asking," Face answered.
"Uhm, you coming, Face?"
Murdock came back from the entrance, smiling sweetly, "Ah, just to clear this one up, guys, it's been 112 ft when I crashed... and somebody was hurt, namely me. I got a broken jaw from it, because for some strange reason BA here just doesn't like it when I crash." Murdock rubbed his jaw with the memory. BA had hit him in fearful rage, but, of course, the end result had been painful anyway.
Face tipped his hand to his head in a flippant salute. "Enjoy your beers, gentlemen," he said.
"I what?" Face asked innocently.
"Aaaaah, no." Face's smile turned a little warmer. "We have been shitting you, though."
"Look, if you're worried about what you said..." Face's smile turned warmer still.
"If you are, who you say you are..." one of the other soldiers said a little breathlessly.
"We are." Face simply confirmed. "Hey, no big deal. You've been nice. We've been having a great time." The flashy smile was back on his face. "Sorry, but the opportunity was too good to let it pass. We simply had to do this."
"What?" Face shouted back, "I'm on vacation, you can't report me!"
"Vacation," Face repeated, then turned back to Sherman and his friends. "As I said, guys, enjoy the beer." He patted Harp on the shoulder. "Especially you, my friend. And next time you meet me, give me my regards."
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