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The Colonel and the Angel

The Colonel and The Angel

By: Junkfoodmonkey

 

Rating: PG

Summary: Hannibal takes care of a baby. This is not something he is comfortable with.

Disclaimer: I don't own the A-Team; I make no money from this.

 

 

The Colonel and the Angel

 

"Oh no, I'm out of coffee!" Murdock sounded horrified.

 

"That's okay, Murdock, we'll have something else." Hannibal said. Murdock just gave him a condescending look.

 

"Do you know how little sleep I had last night?" He asked. He gestured at the baby on her play mat on the floor. "Emma kept us up till dawn!" He grabbed his jacket.

 

"Where are you going?" Hannibal asked, alarmed.

 

"The store, I'll be five minutes."

 

"But… the baby."

 

"She's fine. Just watch her. Five minutes." He was gone, banging the screen door closed.

 

Hannibal turned to the child, regarding her rather like a piece of unexploded ordnance. She seemed to be attempting to eat a rattle, her soft baby mouth trying to get a grip on the brightly coloured plastic.

 

"Right, ah, kid." Hannibal said. "We're not going to have any trouble are we? You just carry on there, you know, eating your toys and I'll… well… stand here and watch you like an idiot, I suppose." She lost interest in the rattle and dropped it. Then she looked up at Hannibal. He'd seen that look at any number of auditions. It said 'you'd better have something good for us today.' Hannibal gave her a big smile.

 

Emma started to cry.

 

Oh no, Hannibal thought. This wasn't supposed to happen. What the hell do I do now? What the heck, he corrected himself, then added, she's not telepathic, you dolt. Her crying increased in pitch. Her little face was bright red now.

 

"Okay, now, come on. What do you want to cry for?" He looked around for a pacifier and remembered that Murdock had decided he didn't approve of them and wouldn't let her have one. Fool.

 

Hannibal knelt on the floor beside the play mat. He picked up the rattle, grimacing at the baby spit all over it and shook it hoping to distract her. The rattle had no effect. Keys, ah yes, babies liked it when you jiggled your car keys didn't they? He took his out and rattled them in front of her.

 

"There you go, look, see, keys. Highest form of entertainment to you baby folks, right?" Apparently not. She didn't stop crying. Hannibal tried another plan. Making faces. She started to scream.

 

"Come on, Murdock, where are you?" With a sinking heart, he remembered going to the convenience store down the road with Murdock while visiting him last week. The clerk there was a new father too and he and Murdock had spent at least twenty minutes trying to outdo each other with their stories of how little sleep they were getting and how much baby barf they'd had on them.

 

It looked like Hannibal was stuck. He needed a plan. Automatically he reached for a cigar, then looked at it, looked at the baby and sighed. He put the cigar away.

 

Murdock had once mentioned that there was one sure-fire way to stop Emma crying. Take her out in the car. Hannibal thought about it and in the space of five seconds the consequences played out in his mind's eye. Murdock would arrive home to find them gone and alert the authorities that they'd been abducted. There'd be a wild chase across LA; all broadcast live via chopper-cam on the rolling news channels. "Breaking News! A-Team man kidnaps baby!" In a tragic case of miscommunication, the police would shoot Hannibal dead and Murdock would appear on TV clutching Emma and sobbing about it all being a big misunderstanding. Hannibal shook his head, began to think the child's crying was affecting his mind.

 

Desperate, he tried his command voice. "Shape up, soldier! Quiet in the ranks." Then in a pleading tone he said, "Look, if you stop crying I'll give you a field commission." Abruptly she stopped. Surprised, relieved, Hannibal grinned. "You like that, huh? Tell you what, I'll make you a major, that way you'll outrank your dad." To his horror, her face screwed up again. "Okay, lieutenant colonel! I meant lieutenant colonel!" Too late. She started howling again.

 

Hannibal groaned in despair. He was going to have to do the unthinkable. He'd hoped it wouldn’t come to this.

 

He picked the baby up.

 

Murdock wandered back in ten minutes later. He was carrying two bags of groceries and had a smug grin on his face. The clerk's baby had only spit up on him once last night. Emma had spit up on Murdock three times. On a new shirt too. An easy victory.

 

Hannibal was sitting on the couch with Emma dozing in his arms.

 

"See," Murdock said. "I knew you'd have no trouble."

 

"Of course not," Hannibal said. "She's an angel." He decided to wait awhile before breaking it to Murdock that his baby daughter was now higher up the chain of command than he was.

 

 

end

 


The Colonel And The Angel by Junkfoodmonkey

 

 


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